Life in Balance: A Tech Challenge

Last week, we screened the film Screenagers to about 160 parents and students. My take is that it was certainly a thought-provoking documentary of the challenges both parents and schools face as we work together to ensure students benefit from the opportunities provided by technology while ensuring they are protected from the potential harm. Since seeing it I have already begun to think about my own screen time as well as the amount of time and the way in which my own children are engaging screens. Our goal was to start a conversation, one that will hopefully be ongoing as we move through the year and beyond. Below is a transcript of my opening comments introducing the film. Even if you missed the screening, I hope these comments will start a conversation for you with the kids you care about.

Welcome to Princess Anne Middle School. I am excited to host this screening of Screenagers and excited to have you here with us tonight, whether you are part of the Princess Anne community or beyond. I am like most of you in this room because, while I am the principal of a middle school, I am also the father to one middle schooler and two elementary schoolers who all love their devices. Before I go on, please take a few minutes to watch this segment of a Simon Sinek talk on dopamine and its positive and negative effects (it is part of a longer presentation; focus on the following segment: 8:00-14:15).

I was asked an interesting question by local news anchor Lasalle Blanks when he came to Princess Anne to do a story on our screening of Screenagers. He asked me if I believed technology was an addiction. I had actually thought quite a lot about that question even before he asked it. If you think about it, what are characteristics of addiction?

Here’s one definition: it’s anything we do without thinking regardless of the potential impact on ourselves, on our families and friends, on our safety, on our relationships, on our bodies, on our brains, or on strangers. Those very same things cause us to behave in ways we might not otherwise behave if not for that thing.

So, it’s easy to identify things that have that impact: cigarettes, alcohol, drugs, gambling, food. I’m not so sure we think about technology in the same way, but perhaps we should.

• Have you ever texted or read email or surfed the internet while driving?

• Has technology use ever caused you to sacrifice sleep?

• Have you ever been in a restaurant and seen an entire family on their phones with seemingly little interest in each other? Have you ever been that family?

• Have you ever written something behind the safety of a screen that you would not say to someone’s face?

• Have you ever seen a car swerve out of a lane, only to pass by the car to see the driver engrossed in their phone? Have you ever been that driver?

• Have you ever held one side of a conversation with someone, perhaps your child or spouse, only to realize that you might as well never have spoken? Have you ever been that someone?

• What happens to you physically, mentally, or emotionally, when you hear the notification from your phone?

• Have you ever allowed technology to serve as a proxy babysitter for your children?

• Did you know the light from cell phones disrupts sleep? Did you know that even the cell phone’s mere presence on your bedside table while sleeping disrupts the quality of your sleep? Did you know the position of your head when using a cell phone puts significant stress on your cervical vertebrae? Did you know persistent cell phone use affects the tendons of your thumbs, can cause early carpal tunnel syndrome, can impact your vision? Did you know excessive screen time can significantly impact the development of your child’s brain (and change adults’ brains, too)?

• If you did know, do you do it or allow it anyway?

• If you didn’t, will that knowledge change your habits or the habits you allow to develop in your children?

I could go on and on. And sadly, I can answer yes to many of those questions. The fact is, I do believe the way we interact with technology, children and adults, has taken on the qualities of an addiction, and a potentially dangerous one. That’s why I felt like it was important that we begin this conversation.

Please do not mistake my intentions, though. I am not going to stand here and advocate for the elimination of technology. Technology is here to stay, and it will continue to be a powerful part of our lives and the lives of our kids.

What I am going to advocate, however, is that we, parents and schools, figure out ways to ensure that we find balance with the use of technology and the wide variety of essential things that make us human, like face to face interaction, like basic goodness and citizenship, like family bonding, like physical activity, like sunlight and nature, like being present in the moment, etc.

And within that context, we have to both teach and learn ways to ensure that we get the most out of the opportunities and access technology provides us without allowing it to consume us and turn us into something much less than we have the potential be.

How do we get there? I believe that one way is by having a conversation as a community. This film will provide us a wealth of things to think about in order to get the conversation going. Our plan is to keep it going well after tonight. After the film, we will spend about 30 minutes hosting an open forum discussion about the things that sparked something in you. You are welcome to join us.

If I had to give you one word on what we are trying to accomplish tonight, or at least start the journey toward, it is this:

Balance

So, let’s get on with the screening. Before I press play, I want to issue you a challenge (consider finding other times and places where you might issue a similar challenge to yourself or family members). I personally fight being controlled by things, so when I drive anywhere I challenge myself not to interact with or even acknowledge my phone while I am in the car. My challenge to you is, turn off your phone (not just silence it), and enjoy the next hour or so just being in the moment as a part of the community that is here tonight (could you issue the same challenge at family meals, when you attend any movie, during homework time, etc.?). I promise you that whatever messages or notifications you might receive while we are here will still be there when we are done, and that if they remain unacknowledged for an hour or so, you will have the chance to catch up.

So I am extending this challenge beyond the screening of the film. The thing to remember is that there is almost never a time when the notification you receive on a phone or other device requires your immediate interaction and/or response. Challenge yourself!